Confessions and What I See

Confession time first.

I have been miserable at keeping track of my eating this week! I don't think I have written anything down since Tuesday at lunch. I could probably try and go back to fill it in, but I don't even remember what I wore yesterday, much less every little thing I ate 3 days ago! Oh well. I haven't been horrible though, I do know that (that comes in two days when I have multiple parties to go to over the weekend!)

Another confession- Even though I have been able to make it to the gym several times a week lately, I am still not working on one of my major trouble spots; the post-beingoverweightfor20yearsandhavingababy-belly pouch. Now I am not delusional enough to think that I will ever ever ever have a flat stomach (until I save up enough $$ for a tummy tuck of course, so...never) but I feel like it HAS to get better than this right? But what am I doing about it? Mostly just letting myself get down over my ruined body and watching TV instead of getting on the floor and doing some crunches.

This brings me to the other topic for the post. What I see when I look in the mirror.

Apparently other people (coworkers) see someone who is about to "blow away" b/c they are so skinny and are telling me I need to stop losing weight b/c I'm too small. Granted, I've lost weight and have some thin areas, but what I see is the aforementioned belly pouch and jiggly cellulite- infused thighs. It's not like I want to settle with what I have and stop working at being healthy, but why can't I also be more satisfied with the results so far and not beat myself up that I'm still just a big old mess! Ugh- body image can be a pretty ugly thing sometimes!

Weekend Roundup

I think I need to go all the way back to Thursday, so here goes;
Thur: 24 pts
Fri: 27 pts
Sat: 29 ish pts (1 activity pt gained)
Sun: 27 ish pts

From Friday on, things got a little hazy. During the week, I can sit at my desk and basically plan out the whole day's points. On the weekend, I may not know what I am going to eat when, and generally just don't bother to write things down. Also, I made cookies on Saturday and Michael made a big breakfast of fried potatoes, bacon and eggs on Sunday- so that increased my total. I will say that I am 99.9% positive that I did not use all my extra points for the week, so overall I would call it a success.

I am going to try to stick to my points for one more week, and then for the rest of the Holiday season I'll just try my best to make smart choices on types and portions of food!

New Pic

I just put a new pic up over in the side bar. It's pretty bad since I took it myself with the timer and no really good surface to put the camera on! Oh well, maybe one of these days I'll do a full picture with some of my new clothes on!
Oh and today's total was 23 pts and 1 activity pt gained!

Back to Basics

Not surprisingly, last week was one of excess. Lots of food but unfortunately, not lots of exercise. I had worked out last on Tuesday and then not again until a couple of days ago on Monday (other than one short walk after Thanksgiving dinner).

I don't know how much I weighed going into the week, since I am no longer weighing in at WW, and I probably won't know how much I weigh after for a while, since we don't own a scale! But I know that I need to get recommitted to a healthier lifestyle leading up to the difficult Christmas celebrations.

So I am going back to basics and started tracking food and points this week (started Mon) and will post them here to keep myself accountable! At my current weight I am allowed 23 pts per day plus the extra 35 per week. I'll also be able to accumulate activity points by going to the gym or taking walks on days when it isn't as nasty as today!
Here is the break-down so far:
Monday: 23 pts plus I earned 1 activity point
Tuesday: 30 pts plus earned 1 activity pt (freaking moe's! I was doing well until Michael insisted on going there for dinner)
Wed: .... will update later!

ahhh backslide already

When I weighed in at WW last Thursday, I had gained 1.6 lbs (!) so technically I am over my goal weight- oops. But it's by less than 1/2 a pound. Not fun to gain like that, but I don't really find it that big of a deal at this point. It was my birthday week and I had fun with that and a GTG the night before. Since last week was my final week of WW and we don't have a scale at home, I guess I'll just have to rely on the fit of my new tight pants to keep me in check! I can't let myself outgrow a new wardrobe.. (which I had lots of fun picking out by the way- yay for new clothes!)

I am still doing well with making it to the gym considering the extreme constraints with my schedule- I've probably averaged about 3 x a week. I think I can see some differences in the tone of my arms but it is weird that I don't feel any stronger. Like today, I was just really sapped of energy or something, b/c I was having problems doing the same weight/rep amounts that I have done since the start. I also wish my legs were moving along a little faster. It is so annoying to be bony in some places but then have tons of fat and dimples in my thighs and belly.

Just like everyone else, this week is going to be about some major self discipline and willpower! I found this recipe for pumpkin pie and hope it will satisfy my sweet tooth so I won't go overboard!

1 Tbsp packed light brown sugar

2 Tbsp butter, melted

2 large egg white(s)

1 large egg(s)

1/2 cup(s) dark brown sugar

/4 tsp table salt

2 tsp pumpkin pie spice, or less to taste

1 cup(s) canned pumpkin

1/2 cup(s) fat-free evaporated milk

1/4 cup(s) lite whipped topping

Instructions

• Position rack in middle of oven. Preheat oven to 350ºF.
  
  
• Place graham crackers and light brown sugar in a food processor; process into crumbs (or smash into crumbs in a sealed plastic food bag with a rolling pin). Spoon crumbs into a small bowl; add melted butter and combine with fingers into a coarse meal. Distribute crumbs evenly on bottom and up sides of an ungreased 9-inch pie plate. Chill for 30 minutes before baking. Bake until crust starts to turn golden, about 8 to 10 minutes; remove from oven and let cool.
  
  
• Meanwhile, in a large bowl, using an electric mixer, whip egg whites until frothy; fold in egg, dark brown sugar, salt, pumpkin pie spice, canned pumpkin and evaporated milk. Beat pumpkin custard until smooth and pour into pie shell. Bake until a knife inserted in center comes out clean, about 45 to 55 minutes. Slice into 8 pieces, top each piece with 1/2 tablespoon of whipped topping and serve warm or at room temperature. Yields 1 slice per serving

It's a WW recipe so of course they gave it a points value- 3 pts per piece in case you cared, so that probably pans out to about 160 ish calories and 2 or 3 grams of fat. I'll let you know how it turns out!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Big News!

No update last week b/c I had no change- 0.0 lbs difference was the official Weight Watchers verdict. But now I am back with some big news..... down 3.4 lbs so I've lost 31.2 lbs total since the end of May and slightly surpassed my original goal!!!

And wouldn't you know it, I just canceled my monthly membership on Monday now that I am only 0.6 lbs away from what I set as my WW goal. I am paid up until the 25th, but I don't know if I want to stick with it after that for another 6 weeks (assuming I lose that last 0.6 lbs). I guess I'll leave that decision until it needs to be made.

How did I lose that much this week!? Maybe the increased strength training is catching up with me, but I know I was less than health conscious with my eating this week. For instance the brunch that we had at the Hibernian on Sunday (which I encourage everyone to try- sooo good....pumpkin pancakes....yum...)

This weekend I am looking forward to some more food treats but I am going to try and stick to moderation. For my birthday, instead of letting someone make/buy me a cake, we are just going to pick one cupcake for each of us- that way the portion size is controlled and I won't be tempted with leftovers! Also I am expecting to get a lot of walking in on Saturday as I FINALLY go on my new "skinny" wardrobe shopping spree- yippee!!!! If only I had an unlimited budget I would be in heaven, but I see a lot of price comparison and restraint in my future :-p

So that's it! I hope everyone has a great weekend and this freakin' weather clears up b.c it is seriously depressing (esp since it has made evident there is a leak somewhere in my car- sunroof is most likely culprit- that will probably cost our savings to fix) oops- this is supposed to be a happy thoughts post ...cupcakes ...clothes ...cupcakes ....clothes ....cupcakes...................

Halloween has been hard!

I haven't really been into Halloween festivities for the last several years, so I guess I kind of forgot how damaging Halloween can be. Now with a child that will be getting more and more excited about Halloween each year, it's going to be in my life for a while!

I did not weigh in last Friday, so I guess I won't know exactly how far back this little holiday will be setting me. Maybe a good thing? I have been able to make it to the gym 3 to 4 times each week, and even though I am not doing anything intense, something is better than nothing.

I don't know what to do to get myself geared by up to lose these last few pounds. I should be excited to be so close, but I'm having a hard time envisioning myself getting there right now and it is really frustrating! And then I am looking ahead to the next few weeks and month, and can't help but feel defeated already with my birthday, then thanksgiving and Christmas coming up- this negativity needs to stop- blah.